Wanting More

So a little confession.  My devotion times haven’t been that great the last week or two.  Sometimes that’s the reality of life but it’s incredible the effect not spending time focused  just on God each day has on me. I haven’t had my typical sunny disposition (ha) and have been short on patience and joy.  

After a great discussion with our small group last night I made sure I took the time this morning that God deserved. Wow.  The reading that I had planned on doing before my “little slump”  was just what I needed to hear from Him today. Challenging, thought provoking and fresh. 

Man it’s cool how God works sometimes.

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Happy Monday everyone!

This is the first in a serious of Monday posts that I’m going to be doing on fighting resistance. I talked in a previous post  about a book call The War of Art by Steven Pressfield and how he talks about resistance.  This series is going to be my thoughts on resistance and how we can fight it and I’ll use the War of Art as a framework for it.

“Resistance cannot be seen, touched, heard, or smelled. But it can be felt. We experience it as an energy field radiating from a work-in-potential. It’s a repelling force. It’s negative. Its aim is to shove us away, distract us, prevent us from doing our work.” (The War of Art pg. 7)

I can’t tell you how many times in my own life I put things off. How often I put off things I know I am suppose to do to help me become who I am suppose to be, and I just don’t do them . I don’t think I’m the only person who feels that way.  I’m not talking about all kinds of extra things for self improvement that will add more things to my calendar. I’m talking the everyday simple “work” of my life.  I have enjoyed putting this blog together but I haven’t posted much here over the last week or so. That’s because the major work of my life has not been getting done.

I am a musician and a creator.  There were several days last week that 9pm would come around and I’d notice that I barely touched the piano that day. The day would fly by and I had been productive at getting “things” done. However they were the busy urgent things of the day. They weren’t the important things or the things I was created to do. 

Then once I realized how little of my work I had done that day I would usually rationalize myself out of doing it, convincing myself I needed some “downtime”.  Now downtime and breaks are important but if I honestly look at my day the things I was doing were my downtime. They were keeping me from doing the things I was suppose to do or created to do.  Some of them were good things but they weren’t the right things. 

For years I would rationalize that I needed to be more productive or prioritize better and sometimes even berate myself for being lazy. Now I’m beginning to realize that something bigger is going on.  Something that can’t be touched, smelled etc. 

I’m not trying to rationalize my way out of my responsibility. I’m trying to call myself to a higher responsibility. Not to get more done but to get more of the things I’m called to done. To fight the resistance that distracts me by telling me I could put that off to accomplish such and such instead which try to make me feel like I have accomplished something but that something usually leaves me feeling hollow.

Instead I want to fight the bigger battle and focus my time on what will add value to my life and the lives of people around me both for now and the future.

In a desire to create an honest environment with this blog I’m going to share some of the things that have been resistance in my life the last while. Some of these are good things. However they were used to put off what I was suppose to be doing instead. 

Computer Games

Exercise 

Cleaning

Snacking 

Over planning

If you’re comfortable feel free to post a comment with some of the things resistance has used to distract you lately.  We can all help keep each other accountable. 

Next week I’ll look at some of the things that we do that make resistance “out to get us”.

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I thought this was great. A clear explanation of how the Canadian goverment works as only Rick Mercer could put it.  Check it out. 

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Well I was working on some documents for the new website for the studio but Google Docs decided to be a bit of a pain. (I’m able to save anything) However this doesn’t affect my love for all things Google. 

So I thought I’d write a quick post about the day. Not sure if I’ve mentioned it here but I’ve actually hired a video producer for the studio.  My hope is to expand on the jingles and such I’ve done in the past to commercials and promo videos for companies and artists.  Plus I’d love to do some more sound design or soundtrack some videos.

 We spent sometime today dreaming about what this could be in the future. Maybe expand into a separate production company.  Bring other freelancers we know into the fold.  I have some hardcore design friends, maybe a photographer and a web programmer. Anyhow, just dreaming and brainstorming but we need to baby step it for now.

I’ve been seeing a lot of little parallels lately. Kind of cheesy at times but it’s been kind of neat. The other day my wife was watching the movie Castaway. Basically Tom Hanks’ character decides he needs to try to get off the island he has been stuck on for four years.  He builds a little raft and is convinced it would be better for him to take a chance with the ocean than to stay and someday die in the “comfort” of the island.  The island is not the ideal situation for him but he knows what to expect there. It has become comfortable and he is able to survive. But that’s not the best life for him and he knows it.  The problem is he doesn’t know if it’s possible to get to the life he desires.

As he heads out onto the ocean he looks back at the island (and the cheesy music plays). He has crossed the point of no return. He sees the place where he was able to survive and now knows he can’t get back there and has to look forward.  But he has no idea what is in front of him or if he can make it.  

That’s how I’m feeling right now. I’ve left my place of comfort. The place I could make work but not be fully alive. I know there are storms coming. I also know if I can make it through them that what I’m seeking is on the other end. I am excited about where God is leading me and praying that he will lead me and give me the strength I need to make it through the storms.

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So today I have a book recommendation and the start of a series for you and me.

About a year ago I was going through a bit of a creative rut. Wasn’t able to finish a lot of the creative endeavors I was taking on and was finding it frustrating.  You know how it is. You have lots of great ideas and will put everything aside to get to them. That includes put aside all the other great ideas you had before that made you put the other great ideas off to the side as well. 

I came across a review for The War of Art on a blog.

I thought it looked interesting so I added it to my next book order. I am very glad I did.

It was a really quick read I think I polished it off over two days. The thing was I couldn’t put it down. I totally thought he wrote the book just for me.  Everything he was talking about just hit home and was a big kick in the rear.   The thing is this book is not light and fluffy with little pat answers for life. Nor is it way off in the distance theory. It just plan spells out in a real simple with no sugar coating the reality that faces any individual tackling a goal whether it be in music, writing (Pressfield is an author), dance, business, or ministry.  

The book is divided into three separate books.  The first is “Resistance”. Basically this chapter covers why we don’t accomplish the things we set out to do. It was a real eye opener. Gave me insights into a lot of the things that I do that essentially sabotage what I’m trying to accomplish. 

The second is “Combating Resistance”. This is covering the idea of turning pro. What separates a pro from and amateur (more than just money). What mind set do we need to have in order to accomplish our goals. 

The third is “Beyond Resistance”. In the book Pressfield acknowledges the existence of God and the role that the higher realm plays in our lives. Now I would not agree in a lot of ways with Pressfield’s beliefs of who God is, but he does offer a lot of interesting thoughts in how our work is effected by things outside of us or this world. 

This is not (nor was it meant to be) a thorough review of the book. Just a strong recommendation of it for anyone that ever struggles with completing goals or has some larger ambitions. I have just finished reading the book for the third time and it still blows me away.

That leads me to the series that I am going to start here. As I’ve said in previous posts I have just left my ministry job. I have left to re pursue a career in music, to relaunch my recording studio and to explore some new ministry opportunities. Like I also said earlier in this post I have a tendency to get sidetracked from what I’m trying to accomplish. So what I am going to try to do is to post every Monday thoughts on fighting the resistance that stands in the way of achieving our aspirations (whether they are in the area of ministry, art, exercise, whatever).  I am going to use parts of the book as a framework or starting point but also share the things that are going in my life (I’m going to be quite honest) as I launch in this new artistic and professional endeavor with the hope that it will be relevant to you wherever you are at. I am not trying to make this into a self help blog or anything like that. Just a place to be honest as we all try to work towards whatever it is God is calling us to.

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Happy Monday

Well it’s early afternoon and I need a coffee.  So while I wait for that to be ready I thought I’d do a quick post about my first day out of (paid) ministry.

So a funny thing. After all the talk in yesterdays post about being free to be myself in church (particularly in the matter of clothing) we didn’t even make it out to church.  Just to follow up of the clothing issue, I have no problem with people dressing up for church. If that’s how someone is most comfortable they should be free to do that. The whole point I was trying to make was that people should be free to come to worship how they are most comfortable. I am glad that I now have that freedom. 

Now today. I am feeling energized. I was up early, spent some quiet time with God and even did a little exercise (just a little).  Besides the usual teaching, this week is dedicated to marketing and organization stuff. Going well. It has to. I was hoping to have most of this done before the end of ’08 but it’s coming along. 

Since I’ll be teaching until well after the kids are in bed I took an extra half hour of this morning to just play and hang with them.  That’s a great way to break up the day.

I spent sometime last night developing the upcoming plans for the blog and hoping to share a bunch of that with you by the end of the week. 

Wherever you are today, my prayer is that you feel alive and in rhythm with the living God.

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Good morning everyone.

So it’s Sunday morning and I’m not busy rushing out the door or getting things ready for this morning. (Still up early but I can’t really help that). I’m really looking forward to going to church with my family this morning. Helping the kids get settled in Sunday school, then picking them up from Sunday school and getting to sit with my wife for an entire service are what I’m most looking forward to.  (The hour drive to the church we’re going to visit today isn’t going to be a highlight but we’ll make do)

Around the house the last few days I’ve also been joking about having the freedom to wear what I choose to when I go to church this morning. At our previous church as staff we had a bit of a dress code. Nothing too strict. Basically no jeans or shorts and to wear a nice shirt. We were never required but would often hear comments from some church members as well as some church leadership and senior staff that wearing a suit is a nice touch.  It was always done in a joking manner. You know those jokes where they say you don’t have to, but at some point you’d really should.

So I’ve been joking wondering if I should wear jeans today (since I can) or even dress up (since I don’t have to). 

Then this morning I’m reading some scripture, Matthew 15 to be exact. It’s the passage where Jesus is talking about how it’s not what a man puts  into his body that defiles him but what comes out.  Jesus also accuses them of breaking the commands of God for their own traditions.  So what I wear to church isn’t making me evil. 

I am not saying my old church put their traditions ahead of the will of God! Not at all. What I am saying is that sometimes as ministry leaders what is expected of us (both real and perceived expectations) in our roles can keep us from having the freedom to come comfortably to church on a Sunday morning.  In order to fulfill the expectations of what the church is suppose to be for a group of people we are unable to be ourselves. 

There were many times that I felt unable to be myself leading worship either because of the songs that I was leading, the expectations of others in my interactions with them and even feeling uncomfortable in my own skin because of what I was wearing. Was I right in feeling that way. I don’t know but that doesn’t change the fact that I did feel I couldn’t totally be myself. I am looking forward to going to church this morning with the freedom of no expectations from anyone but my family. 

My prayer this morning is for all of you leading a ministry, (and it doesn’t matter if it’s worship, preaching or ushering) is that you will have the freedom to be yourself as you meet with God.

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